I kind of feel like I’ve come crawling back to this blog, tail between my legs, begging it to take me back. Please, baby, please. Okay, well, not really. But it’s no lie, I suffer from issues with blogmentum. There’s a bit more to that. Here, let me explain.
Originally, I had billed this as a sexy sex blog with sex in it, and that turned out to be more difficult that I’d have liked to admit at the time. Unfortunately, my partner and I weren’t (and aren’t) having much sex to speak of, and the idea of documenting our attempts was more depressing than not blogging at all, so I opted for that. I buried myself in work to great success and kept the blog up as a reminder that I would come back to it one day.
Why is today that day? There are few reasons. For one, my partner and I have decided to amicably dissolve our relationship over the next few months. Because we live together and things are still very grey-area between us, we haven’t publicly announced this (asides from to my boss and a few close friends) and we continue to enjoy (and sometimes really not enjoy) our time in limbo. We still sleep next to each other, we still support each other, we still cook dinner together and laugh until we cry at Community. We’re just slipping out of the romantic future we had envisioned together and moving towards what will hopefully be a really good friendship. It’s kind of sad, and I’m sure there will be a longer post about this in the future, but this isn’t a blog of depression, it’s a blog of cautious optimism. Onwards and upwards!
Another reason is that I’ve started blogging for sites like a real writer. I’m still loving my work in PR and marketing, but I have always been a writer and I wanted to add that back into my life. I’ve had a few professional blog dalliances, but I decided to pull up my socks and actually get some stable gigs lined up, so I’ll now be blogging weekly on three sites. I’ll be focusing on the best porn has to offer on Peeperz in my column called Crème de la Crème, I’ll be doing DVD, website and product reviews for Whack!Magazine and I’ll be blogging about life as a feminist in porn at GirlzPorn. I’m pretty psyched, and I think having a regular schedule will be great for me.
Yet another reason is that things have been going really well for our company and there is more need for me to be an accessible, reliable figure in porn, as I often represent the sites at events, meetings and on radio shows. Not like I want to be a big diva, but having a little more clout is never a bad thing. In the past year and a half, we won a Feminist Porn Award, we’ve inked a deal with Hustler to make a DVD, we’ve been named best blowjob site on Rabbits Reviews and now we’ve just been nominated for an XBIZ Award for Specialty Site of the Year. I’ve gone to events in Montreal, Toronto and New York and I’ll be adding Los Angeles, Phoenix and hopefully Las Vegas to the list in the next few months. The more I make the rounds, the more people I meet, and I want to be the best and most well-rounded version of myself I can be.
On a personal note, I’m going through all sorts of changes in my life and I want to use this time of change to be a catalyst for new habits and experiences. Asides from just moving out of my place with my partner, I’ll be moving back to Toronto. Still keeping my same job, but moving back to a place with the amazing support system I crave. In the years following university, the mass exodus of all of my friends from Montreal was gradual, but even the new people I’ve met seem to be moving on to greener pastures at this point. Considering I have every reason to leave, I might as well capitalize on the opportunity and be closer to my family and all of my incredible friends.
I’ve felt a bit arrested in Montreal and I think that a new city will bring on new possibilities for me in a lot of ways. I’m also committing myself to a blog schedule of 2 updates a week here. More than that would be great, but I guarantee that I’ll be posting original content here twice a week. Deal? Deal. Thanks for being patient for 1.5 years. It feels good to be back.